What a Crockery Shooting Draft
What a Crockery
Episode #3
Production #V0803
Story by: Robert Tapert & Liz Friedman
Teleplay by: Hilary J. Bader
Directed by: Chris Graves
Shooting draft April 20, 1998 - June 8, 1998
Pacific Island Pictures, LTD, All Rights Reserved © 1998
Cast List
Hercules
Jason
Iolaus - (ee-OH-lus)
Strife
Ares
Alcmene - (alk-MAY-nee)
Tarsus
Hera (O.S.)
Announcer (V.O.)
Set List
Interiors:
Cheiron's Academy - Dorm
Cheiron's Academy - Cafeteria
Cheiron's Academy - Training Hall
Hera's Cave
Hera's Cave - Chalice Chamber
Kora's Inn
Alcmene's House
Alcmene's Kitchen
Ares' Temple
Olympus
Exteriors:
Cheiron's Academy
Alcmene's House
Near Alcmene's House
Alcmene's Backyard
Forest Road
Kora's Inn
Cave
BRIEF RECAP OF EPISODES 1 & 2 - EDITED FROM THEIR FOOTAGE:
FADE IN:
INT. OLYMPUS - DAY
ARES talking to STRIFE.
Previously on Young Hercules.
If you were any good at being bad, you'd dare what no god has dared before. To destroy a mortal son of Zeus.
You mean Hercules?
INT. CHEIRON'S ACADEMY - TRAINING HALL - DAY
Strife and HERCULES work out on the ropes.
My uncle... used to tell me about... that cave up on the mountains.
INT. THE CAVE - NIGHT
ACTION of JASON, Hercules, and IOLAUS grab Hera's chalice.
What cave?
...They got a chalice up there made by Zeus himself.
EXT. CAVE - DAY
The Phoenix bursts into flaming life and flies off.
EXT. CHEIRON'S ACADEMY - DAY
QUICK CUTS of the Phoenix carrying off Hercules, then Herc stabbing at it, then Herc surviving (GROANING):
Is my dear brother Hercules hooked?
INT. KORA'S INN - NIGHT
Strife leans over toward Iolaus conspiratorially.
Check the way she looks at Jason.
Iolaus looks over at Jason, who's flirting with Kora.
INT. KORA'S INN - NIGHT
Iolaus is tempted by the coins left out on the counter.
INT. CHEIRON'S ACADEMY - DORM - DAY
CONSTABLE TARSUS picks up Iolaus' full money pouch.
Take him away!
Cheiron!
INT. KORA'S INN - NIGHT
Hercules steps through the doorway, confronting Strife.
Why did you frame Iolaus? And why did you send me to the phoenix cave to get the chalice?
EXT. KORA'S INN - DAY
The Herc/Strife big furniture fight bursts out through Kora's window. QUICK CUTS OF THE ACTION, over:
Look -- I'm sorry I got you all mixed up in this mess.
Mess? What mess?
Yeah -- we like getting chased by giant birds.
Kora gets a look at her trashed inn. Iolaus eases up close and, with a come-on smile:
Need a hand cleaning up?
END QUICK-SHOT, MONTAGE RECAP - DISSOLVE TO A REPEAT OF THE LAST SCENE FROM THE PREVIOUS EPISODE:
INT. CHEIRON'S ACADEMY - DORM - NIGHT
...on either end of a bed, still energized from the night's excitement. They speak in EXCITED WHISPERS.
...What are you gonna do with Hera's chalice?
(correcting)
Zeus and Hera's chalice.
Herc reaches down into his footlocker or backpack under his bed and comes up with the glittering red chalice.
Okay, Zeus and Hera's chalice?
They stare at it for a moment, up close, watching the faint candlelight flicker around within it. Finally Hercules gets a look of determination on his face -- mixed with a little fearful excitement. Thought quiet, this is a BIG MOMENT.
(determined, anxious)
I'm taking it to my dad.
END RECAP - DISSOLVE TO NEW SCENE:
INT. ARES' TEMPLE - DAY
Ares sits on his throne, looking upward, in the midst of talking with someone above him (HERA, whom we do not see.) He is grimacing at the intensity of her voice s the walls RATTLE.
WHAT?!
(feigned innocence)
Mother, I thought you knew. I had no idea you cared so much about that chalice.
Hera SCREAMS. Objects spring off the walls. Ares ducks as a few choice pieces of pottery fly over his head.
I want the perpetrator --
-- dead? Can't do it. It was Hercules. You know how Zeus feels about little bro. Daddy put that special protection on him, preventing us gods from killing him.
The raging torrent STOPS as Hera grows eerily calm.
(laughs)
Hercules?!
Am I missing something, here?
Zeus made a promise to me when he made us that chalice. Anyone who takes it from its rightful place is condemned to death.
(getting it)
Then by Zeus' own words, his protection of Hercules is off.
(thrilled realization) Well, well, well. Little brother is finally on his own. And he's all mine.
(looks upward, sighs) Thank you, Mother --
CLOSE ON ARES as he smiles, savoring the moment.
-- for the chance to kill Hercules...
FADE OUT.
Act One
FADE IN:
INT. CHEIRON'S ACADEMY - DORM - DAY
ZEUS'S CHALICE glistens in the morning light, sticking out from Herc's full backpack.
(can't believe it)
All that trouble over a red cup.
IOLAUS playfully grabs the chalice from HERCULES' pack. Then, as Herc lunges for it, Iolaus almost drops it.
Hey! Watch it!
Iolaus sniffs at the chalice as:
Man, I wonder what Hera and Zeus drank out of this thing?
Just then JASON ENTERS, grabbing the chalice out from under Iolaus' nose. Jason has a small packed bag with him.
Not the slop they serve here, I can promise you that.
He examines it closely.
Nice work... Think Zeus would make me a matched set?
He tosses the chalice back to Herc, who catches it awkwardly.
Careful!
Herc gets a safe hold on the chalice and looks at it closely. He gets lost in thought as he stares at it, fingering its curves.
I've never seen anything my dad made before.
(realizes) I've never seen my dad.
Iolaus and Jason ease closer to Herc as he frowns at the chalice, looking closer.
(sad, angry)
If Zeus wants his chalice, he's going to have to talk to me.
Herc forcefully stuffs the chalice back in his bag.
(joking to cheer him up)
Give Zeus a break. I bet the king of the Gods has a busy schedule.
So do I -- let's get moving.
Now Herc, you're sure you want to take this to Zeus, not Hera's cave?
(over-confident)
I just took care of a god. I can handle the rest of them.
WIPE TO:
INT. ARES' TEMPLE - DAY
Ares sits on his throne. He looks around and yells out:
STRIFE!
Strife POOFS in, lying back on a chaise lounge, with a Pretty Young Girl dropping a grape into his mouth from a bunch she is holding. Both are surprised to find themselves in Ares' Temple. Strife coughs out the grape as the Girl SCREAMS.
If you really want to make it to Olympian status, you're going to have to stop letting half-gods kick you around.
Ares waves a hand: the Girl disappears.
Chill, Unc. I was just getting warmed up.
I saw what you were warming up.
Yeah. Is she phat, or what?
Fat? You're kidding.
(using visual cues)
No Uncle. Not fat. Phat. You know, she's a real Persephone. Fly. Dope. Def.
(reaching) Groovy? Anyway, I was just--
Did I give you any indication that I care about your life?
No.
Then don't share, please. Question: Where's my mother's chalice?
(anxious that he's right)
Uh... Hercules has it?
And what is Hercules doing with it?
(scared, doesn't know)
Um... Accessorizing his personal space?
Ares energy-tosses Strife across the room as he bellows:
He's taking it to Zeus's temple!
Strife picks himself up quickly.
That's not good.
(angry)
We need to get some pain and misery out of that chalice!
(grins)
Twist my arm, Unc.
It cannot reach the safety of Zeus' temple or be put back in Hera's cave!
Ares pauses, closing his eyes in ecstasy, remembering:
(relishing)
Strife, have you ever seen Hera when she's angry -- I mean, when laying waste to an entire city wouldn't begin to satisfy her fury?
Strife scoots closer to Ares. His nostrils flare as a thrill runs up his spine.
(aroused)
Only in my dreams, Uncle.
Ares opens his eyes and leans over as Strife gets closer.
(intimate joy)
She starts to glow, as if a cold fire were burning inside her.
(eager for more)
Yes...
Winds rise. The earth trembles. Animals run in fear.
(eager for more)
Yes...
And do force in existence -- even Almighty Zeus -- dare cross her path.
Yes!
Strife, a truly sublime level of suffering awaits whoever has that chalice when my mother finds it.
Strife bites his fingers in obscene joy, then shivers with anticipation.
I have some nasty ideas!
And Strife...
Yes, Uncle.
Try to be subtle about it.
Strife makes a "Who me?" pose.
EXT. FOREST ROAD
Establish forest road. Herc, Iolaus, and Jason are walking along it, full of themselves. Iolaus is SCREEN-RIGHT.
So what are you going to say to Zeus when you meet him?
'Thrown any good thunderbolts lately?'
CLOSER on the guys as they walk along.
'Like the robes, who's your tailor?'
(serious, considering)
I don't know... what do you talk to dads about?
How his day went. What plans he has coming up.
Why hasn't he been around for a year.
A FOOTBALL-SHAPED-AND-SIZED MELON lies at the SCREEN-RIGHT edge of the forest road.
Tell him what you've been doing.
Like when we nailed Strife at Kora's.
Back to them walking along.
Herc nailed Strife at Kora's.
(pooh-poohing)
Minor technicality. If I'd had a shot at him, he'd have gone down.
On the word "down", Iolaus DROPS OUT OF THE SHOT. Jason and Herc, comically unconcerned, pause and look down. Iolaus rubs his head, then reaches for the thing that tripped him: It's the football-shaped melon.
Guys, ya know what I'm thinking?
Iolaus POPS BACK UP INTO SHOT with the others, now holding the melon:
(calling the game)
Melon ball!!!
Iolaus tosses Jason the Melon. Jason and Iolaus play a few tosses of keep away just over Herc, who doesn't like this.
Not now! We have to get the chalice to the temple.
Can't handle us, huh?
Iolaus and Jason toss their travel bags beside a tree.
What happened to 'mighty Hercules, conqueror of gods?'
Herc grudgingly takes off his pack, which contains the chalice, which sticks out a bit, and gently sets it between the other two. He's shaking his head, not pleased, but resigned.
I guess if we're going to get to Zeus's temple sometime this week, I'll just have to teach you two a lesson.
Hercules runs toward Jason. Jason crosses laterally and hands off to Iolaus. Herc goes after Iolaus. Jason moves behind the line of scrimmage.
I'm open. Toss it back.
Iolaus tosses to Jason who starts to move forward. But Herc is barreling towards him. He points down the center.
Iolaus. Go inside.
As Herc runs toward Jason, Jason backs up. Herc tackles as Jason releases the melon. Iolaus has run down field and gone OUTSIDE towards the outer edges of the field.
No, INSIDE!
Iolaus, realizing his mistake, quick steps back towards the center of the field of play. He leaps for the melon.
ON IOLAUS - SLOW MO
He just misses the catch.
RESUME NORMAL
and the Melon hits the ground and EXPLODES, covering Iolaus with fruit pulp.
I thought you meant the other inside.
Jason helps Iolaus to his feet. Herc is with them.
(joking)
Maybe next time you won't challenge 'mighty Hercules.'
As Iolaus wipes off the melon juice, he takes a taste:
Mmm... good melon.
Last meal?
Herc, Iolaus, and Jason turn to see Strife, grinning like the Cheshire Cat, draped along a low tree limb.
Strife! What do you want -- another whipping?
(playing with them)
Oh, I couldn't fight you, Hercules! You're way too strong.
(looks, chooses) How about the little one?
Iolaus, incensed, starts for Strife, but Herc holds him back.
Who's little?!
Hold it, Iolaus. He's after something again.
No... more like I already got it.
The chalice appears in Strife's hand, where Strife grins at it.
The chalice!
Now you see it --
(chalice disappears) -- now you don't.
Strife! What did you do with it?!
Strife gloats from his branch as Herc steps up to him.
Like I'm going to just tell you!
Fine. We'll find it ourselves.
Better move fast. Hera knows it's missing. I wouldn't want to be anywhere near it when she comes looking for it.
Good home. Nice family.
Herc yanks Strife down from the branch, by his collar.
You put some innocent person in danger?!
(grinning)
Ya know, I never thought of Alcmene as all that innocent.
(stunned; to the others)
Mother.
Herc lets go of Strife and he, Iolaus, and Jason rush off to Alcmene's place. Strife looks up at the sky.
Subtle enough for you, Uncle?
EXT. ALCMENE'S BACKYARD - DAY
Alcmene is gardening, with Herc's dog, BEAR, at her side. Suddenly she hears the sound of a HARD FALL.
Ow!
Bear barks and rushes off. Alcmene follows toward the front yard.
Bear is nuzzling and WHINING SYMPATHETICALLY at a MAN lying on the road (we see him from behind). Alcmene calls from a distance:
Are you all right?!
Alcmene hurries up. We still don't see the man's face as he struggles weakly to move.
I... I think so.
Get back now, Bear. Let the man be.
(to man) Here, let me help you.
Alcmene reaches behind the man and helps him sit up.
I'll be fine. My horse threw me and ran off.
(grimaces; holds arm) Ow.
The dog sits calmly. MAYBE TOO CALMLY. But as we look closely, Bear looks more confused than happy. (QUIET NERVOUS WHINE?) Alcmene relaxes. She smiles.
Bear's not usually so friendly with strangers. You must have a way with dogs.
Oh, I do.
Camera pulls back to REVEAL: Ares, carrying the chalice in a bag.
I do.
He smiles back. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
FADE OUT.
Act Two
FADE IN:
INT. ALCMENE'S KITCHEN - DAY
Alcmene and Ares are just finishing a meal. Ares wears a sling on his left arm. Alcmene is washing/wiping the chalice. She stares at it, feels its curves, enjoys its beauty. She has nothing anywhere near so nice.
(reluctant)
I'm sorry, I just couldn't take your gift. It's too nice.
(double meaning)
Please. You don't know how happy it would make me for you to have it.
As Alcmene takes the cleaned chalice and sets it on the table near Ares, her arm unintentionally brushes his. She notices. There's an undeniable attraction which adds to the tension.
But we hardly know each other.
Ares turns to Alcmene, who stands close. He lays on the charm:
Your kindness to a stranger tells me all I need know about your heart.
(a bit flustered)
I -- I'll have to think about it.
WIPE TO:
EXT. ALCMENE'S HOUSE - DAY
Hercules runs down the road towards the house. Farther back, Jason and Iolaus stumble after him, ready to drop.
Mother! Mother!
The door opens and Alcmene steps out carrying a pitcher of lemonade and some mugs. They stop running, relieved.
Hercules. What are you doing here?
Iolaus stumbles up to Alcmene in a near panic.
(gasping)
Big danger... We thought...
(he sees the lemonade) Oooo. Lemonade.
Strife must have lied -- again.
Who lied? What's going on?
(embarrassed, guilty)
We... I took something from Hera to give to Zeus. I know I shouldn't have.
(anxious, angry)
You took something of Hera's?!
But then Strife took the chalice from me and he said he'd left it here, with you.
(suddenly scared)
Was it ruby red? Glittery?
Looking for this?
Ares fills the front doorway, holding up Hera's chalice.
Ares!
Ares?!
It's been a while, hasn't it, baby Brother?
(angry, betrayed)
How dare you come into my house pretending to --
In one quick move, Ares tosses the cloth sling from his arm, then extends his arm toward Alcmene, who is yanked by a godly forcefield over to him, where she hovers within it.
Mother!
Herc, Iolaus, and Jason start towards Ares. Ares gestures, and the forcefield intensifies. Alcmene cries out. They stop, afraid for her safety.
Uh, uh, uh. Get me too excited and I might... Well who knows what I might do.
What do you want, Ares? If you're here for Hera's chalice, just take it.
What I want is to watch you suffer. When you grabbed the Queen's bauble, you gave up your daddy's protection. I can destroy you now.
(grins at Alcmene) And I want your mother to watch.
Alcmene gathers all her strength --
Stay... away... from my... SON!
-- and manages to move amid the forefield just enough to kick Ares in the shins. Taken by surprise Ares drops the chalice and Alcmene (forcefield vanishes). Herc lunges O.S. and he yells to Iolaus:
Get the chalice!
Alcmene is just getting up as Hercules lunges to her and helps. Iolaus makes a deft dive for the chalice, grabbing it and tumbling back to his feet. Ares turns to face Herc and Alcmene.
Well, well, Hercules. Your mother's got spunk. I hate spunk.
Ares hurls a ball of FIRE at them. Herc and Alcmene leap away, to either side, as the TREE behind them explodes in flames. Herc tumbles to his feet near Jason and Iolaus.
Get that Chalice back to Hera's cave! Fast!
We're gone!
They run off. Ares grabs Herc from behind.
You know, I don't really care about the chalice. That's Hera's thing.
A piece of crockery is shattered on Ares' upper back by -- Alcmene.
Your mother is starting to annoy me.
Ares reaches one arm behind him without even looking and knocks Alcmene flying with an energy bolt.
Leave her ALONE!
Incensed, Herc twists in Ares' grip, grabs him by his leather shirt, and TOSSES him over his head. Ares flies through the air and lands on one of the "picnic benches", smashing it to splinters. Hercules and Alcmene rush into Alcmene's house.
Come on!
Can't hide from me, little brother.
As Ares gets up to brush himself off, he sees the lemonade. He stops and pours himself a glass. "Yum!" Just then, Strife POOFS in beside Ares.
(gleeful)
Let me! Mama first!
Strife starts for the house, but is yanked back by the back of the collar by Ares.
Gaak!
Young Gods. Always in such a rush. There's an art to torturing mortals. Let Hercules think he's safe. It will make the end so much sweeter.
(smiles, content) Ah, the terror of the hunted.
INT. ALCMENE'S HOUSE
A tense Herc and Alcmene peek out the window at Ares and Strife. She turns to him and grabs his arm, pleading:
Ares isn't after me, he's after you. Get yourself to safety.
Mom, I can't leave you here alone.
If the gods had wanted to hurt me, they would have done it long ago. But if what Ares says is true, your father can no longer protect you from them.
An angry, anguished Hercules pushes away from her.
I never asked for his protection! Why isn't he protecting you?!
Just then the house shakes badly, as if rocked by a huge earthquake. Hercules has to grab onto Alcmene to keep them both from falling. The shaking stops:
(fake innocence)
Knock, knock? Anybody home?
I'm sorry, Mother. Getting the chalice to impress Father was exactly the sort of thing you warned me not to do.
(loving)
It doesn't matter now, Son.
(urgent) But you need to run! You can't defeat the God of War.
(cries out: scared, defiant)
Run? Run where?!
The house shakes badly again. Herc and Alcmene hold on. Hercules shows intense resolve: he's staying to fight.
(quiet finality)
I'm not running any more.
INT. HERA'S CAVE
Jason and Iolaus sneak through the cave past the PHOENIX'S NEST (ref. EP. #V0801). Empty now. They hesitate.
C'mon. Hurry!
It's dead, right? The Phoenix? It's not coming back.
What do you think? It's going to rise up out of the ashes and come back to life?
They hurry in deeper, getting lost in the darkness, as:
Maybe there's some other treasure in there that we missed before?!
We're here to return the chalice, Iolaus, not exchange it.
INT. HERA'S CAVE - THE CHALICE CHAMBER
The pedestal is empty. TWO GUARDS are carved in relief into the stone wall.
That was easy.
Yeah. Too easy.
What is it with you, Jason? Why can't something just be easy?
Just then, a LIGHT washes over the TWO STONE CARVINGS and the TWO STONE GUARDS come to life.
That's why!
The STONE GUARDS move SLOWLY, threateningly toward Iolaus.
EXT. ALCMENE'S HOUSE - DAY
Herc walks out of the house.
All right, Ares. Let's end this, now.
See, Strife, just like I told you. It's so much more satisfying when the victim begs for it.
Herc rushes Ares. He tackles him hard, knocking him back, but not much. Hercules is out of his league. WAY out of his league.
INT. HERA'S CAVE - CHALICE CHAMBER
As before. The Guards moving in on IOLAUS.
Protect the chalice.
The chalice?! What about me?
Jason tries to hold back the Guards, but it's like a Pee Wee footballer trying to stop two pro linemen. The Guards are SLOW, but INEXORABLE. They shove Jason out o the way as they back Iolaus up. Jason recovers and runs past Iolaus taking a hand-off. The Guards stop and turn, and move SLOWLY after Jason. Jason tries to fake left. Fake right. But the GUARDS stay with him. Moving closer and closer.
Iolaus! Inside. Go inside.
IN SLOW MO
NFL highlight moment. Iolaus runs towards the pedestal. The Guards close in on Jason. Jason lifts the chalice to throw it.
EXT. ALCMENE'S HOUSE - DAY
Ares is getting the better of Herc, but holding back. He's playing with Herc.
Give it to him, Uncle Ares!
Everything was fine until you came along.
He hits Herc with a FIREBALL, which knocks him back. (NOTE: THESE FIREBALLS WILL EXPLODE JUST IN FRONT OF HERC, LIKE GRENADES.)
I was the favorite.
He hits Herc with another FIREBALL.
Word!
The number one. Me. Ares, Son of Zeus. God of War.
Ares reaches his hands up to the heavens, and a stream of fire roars down from them. Herc picks up a hunk of the picnic table top and holds it as a shield as the stream of fire pummels at him.
Supplanted by a half-mortal. I would have destroyed you long ago, if it weren't for Zeus' special protection.
A final blast of fire shatters the table top and knocks Herc flying. Herc lands with a THUD near Strife, who lens in to sneer at Herc.
But you blew that when you lifted Hera's chalice. You're mine now.
(sheepishly; to Ares) Sorry. I mean he's yours now, Uncle.
Ares raises his hands, wide: a big fireball appears between them.
Nothing can save you, Hercules.
Ares yells, as he is about to bring down the fireball on Herc.
INT. HERA'S CAVE - CHALICE CHAMBER - SLO MO
THE CHALICE flies end over end through the air. IOLAUS leaps for it. He gets his fingertips on it. As he comes down he places the Chalice back in its home on the pedestal. A LIGHTNING BOLT flashes UP from the Chalice.
EXT. NEAR ALCMENE'S HOUSE - DAY
SCREAMING his rage, res brings the fireball down, but stops, inches from Herc's face.
NO!
A beat, then an anguished Ares straightens up (fireball gone) and looks up to the skies.
Why protect him again, Father? I was so close! What about me? I have needs.
Then Ares looks daggers over at Herc.
Don't think this is over, Brother. I'll be back.
I'm counting on it.
Ares sneers then POOFS away. Alcmene rushes up to Herc and throws her arms around him. He holds her.
Jason and Iolaus must have gotten the chalice back to the cave.
Be thankful for such good friends.
I am.
As Alcmene and Hercules have their moment together, we:
DISSOLVE TO:
INT. CHEIRON'S ACADEMY - CAFETERIA - NIGHT
Hercules, Iolaus, and Jason cleaning off the dinner tables. Punishment for returning late to academy.
You'd think Cheiron would have accepted the old 'The God of War vaporized my homework' excuse.
For Cheiron there are no excuses.
Two weeks of kitchen duty. Pretty extreme.
I won't forget what you guys... you know. And you can always count on me if... well... you know.
Ditto.
Ditto.
Embarrassed, they go back to cleaning.
Hey, Iolaus, clean a little to the left.
Iolaus scrapes some food off a plate just as Jason is reaching for the plate getting food all over Jason's hand.
The other LEFT!
Jason tosses the food at Iolaus. Iolaus ducks. The food hits Herc.
EXT. CHEIRON'S ACADEMY - NIGHT
Light flickers from the windows. As does the sound of RAUCOUS BOYS, having a good time.
FADE OUT.
