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| '''[[1.10 Cyrano de Hercules|« Back to "1.10 Cyrano de Hercules"]]'''<td></tr></table> | | '''[[1.10 Cyrano de Hercules|« Back to "1.10 Cyrano de Hercules"]]'''<td></tr></table> |
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| == Teaser ==
| | To Be Added. |
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| '''Hercules:''' "Look, I-I, don't, uh-- "
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Uh-uh. Come on. Come on."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Guys, listen, I don't know about this, all right?"
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| '''Jason:''' "Come on, Hercules. It's not gonna hurt."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Well, I've never been on a blind date, before, all right?"
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| '''Jason:''' "There's three of them, and two of us. We _need_ you."
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Yeah-- do the math."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Whoa!"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Not that the situation didn't have potential."
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| '''Jason:''' "Hey, ladies. This is Hercules. This is Penelope."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Oh-- hi."
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| '''Penelope:''' "Hello."
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| '''Jason:''' "Sabrina."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Hi."
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| '''Jason:''' "And Tara-- your date."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Uh-- hi. So, uh-- nice to meet you."
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| '''Tara:''' "Is it?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Hey-ey-ey! Fellas! What a nice surprise!"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Not the words I would have used."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Uh-- ha-ha-- e-everybody-- this is Hephaestus."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Hi."
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| '''Kora:''' "Well-- looks like some local boys finally got a date."
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| '''Jason:''' "Ha-- that's pretty funny. Huh-- well, ladies-- I think that, mh-- it would-- "
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| '''Iolaus:''' "So, uh-- how long have you been-- ?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' [Interrupting]: "Ah! Bread!"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Hercules. Herc!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "One second."
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| '''Iolaus:''' [Whispers]: "You gonna do something about this?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Wanna see a neat trick? OK."
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| '''Hercules:''' [Whispers]: "Why me?"
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| '''Iolaus:''' [Whispers]: "'Cause-- he's your brother."
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| '''Jason's [?] Voice:''' "Ah, it's-- really neat."
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| '''Hercules:''' "That's good."
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| '''Penelope:''' "It's-- getting a little late, isn't it?"
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| '''Jason:''' "Huh? No. Wha?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Uh-- hey, Hephaestus-- can I talk to you for a second?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Yeah."
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| '''Hercules:''' "OK, uh-- I'm just gonna-- . Uh-- hi."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Hi."
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| '''Hercules:''' "How you doin'?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Good, good."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Good-- nice to see ya."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Yeah."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Uh, listen-- me and the guys-- it's funny, actually-- we had some plans for tonight?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Oh, that's great! What're we gonna do?!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Uh, uh-- hey! Hey, guys-- listen. I was just about to tell Hephaestus, here, how much fun he might have if he had a date of his own-- huh?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "You'd do that? For me?"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Uh, we'd do _what_, exactly?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Well, ya'd help me find a date! Aw-- what wonderful friends you are! Oh, that's great."
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| '''Jason:''' "Hold that thought, here."
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| '''Penelope:''' "Jason-- "
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| '''Jason:''' "Sum'in's come up. Uh-- "
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| '''Penelope:''' "Jason-- "
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| '''Jason:''' "Uh, I'll just be one minute, OK?"
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| '''Penelope:''' "Jason."
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| '''Iolaus:''' "OK, OK-- make us proud."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "OK."
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Go."
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| '''Hercules:''' [Whispers]: "Come here. Come here, come here-- there's something on your face."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Hey-- what do I say first?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Oh."
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| '''Jason:''' "I, uh-- oh-- ‘Hello.'"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "‘Hello.'"
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| '''Hercules:''' "‘Hello.'"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Yeah, yeah, yeah-- and then tell her, uh-- she has pretty eyes-- even if she doesn't. Go."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Hello."
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| '''Jason:''' "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."
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| '''Iolaus:''' [Whispers]: "The eyes."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' [Whispers]: "Oh, her eyes."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "You have, uh-- very beautiful eyes. Ooh!"
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| '''Jason:''' "Sorry, you're not his type."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "No-- no."
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| '''Iolaus:''' "But, uh-- you do have pretty eyes."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Oh, yeah-- they're great. Hey-- yeah."
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| '''Jason:''' "Where'd they go?"
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| '''Kora:''' "They're gone."
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| '''Jason:''' "What?!"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Jas-- they've gone."
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| '''Jason:''' "Why did they go?"
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| '''Kora:''' "Gee, they probably didn't wanna sit alone all night."
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| '''Iolaus:''' "We can catch ‘em."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Listen, Hephaestus, don't sweat it, all right? I mean-- we mean well, but-- the truth is-- we have no idea what we're talkin' about. Listen-- if I know one thing about women, and that's it-- you can't make ‘em like you-- all right."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "No-- but I can _make_ a girl."
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| '''Kora:''' "Oh, yeah-- sure."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Are you serious?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Yeah."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Oh-- uh-- OK. I mean, I-I guess. I mean-- he is the god of making stuff, but-- "
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Hey-- and you can help me! It's-- it's brilliant!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Oh, it is!"
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| == Act One ==
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| '''Hercules:''' "Hephaestus-- making a woman sounds like an incredibly bad idea."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "But I can do it!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "It's not a question 'a ‘Can do it'; it's a question 'a ‘Should do it'. And trust me-- you shouldn't do it-- it's wrong. A person's too-- you know, unique-- they're too-- complicated-- [Sighs] uh, especially, a female person."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "But, why?"
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| '''Hercules:''' [Sighs]: "I don't know. Um-- they've just always seemed more complicated to me."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Look-- I want to know. I mean-- what is it in a woman?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Aw-- Hephaestus-- I don't know."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "I want to understand. I've lived most of my life alone. I haven't experienced the world like you. So-- tell me. I mean-- what-- is it about a woman that-- makes her what she is?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "It's-- it's everything. It's anything. It's-- "
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "_W-w-what_ things?!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "OK, um-- chk-chk-- a woman is smart."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Sm-- "
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| '''Hercules:''' "And-and she _knows_ herself. Well-- she's got a very strong will."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Strong-- like bronze."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Sure, and, uh-- you know, and-- her senses are amazing, OK? She can see and hear things that men can't and, uh-- well, their hearts are pure."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Pure-- you mean, like gold."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Well-- sure, um-- and she's caring, and she's generous, and-- she's full 'a love and affection, and-- "
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Love?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Ah! Ah! OK. Oh-ho-ho. It's done."
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| '''Hercules's Voice:''' "Hephaestus!"
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| '''Hephaestus's Voice:''' "Galatea."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "I'll call her ‘Galatea'."
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| '''Hercules:''' "No-- no, no, no, no, no, no! Hephaestus-- tell me you didn't."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Whaddya think?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Well-- I mean-- it's beautiful-- "
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| '''Hephaestus:''' [Interrupting]: "Ahhh! Chhhhh! Not ‘It'-- ‘She'."
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| '''Hercules:''' "‘She'?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "OK. All right. It'll take a minute. I've got something for her. OK."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Uh, Hephaestus, I j-- "
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Yeah."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Something special. I have to get her something special. A songbird-- well, maybe she'd like that. It sounds so pretty. No-- wait. Even better! Butterflies!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Amazing. Hephaestus. Hephaestus. You-- uh, Hephaestus! Hephaestus! Um-- she's-- her-- "
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| '''Galatea:''' "Hello."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Y-- uh, you can talk? Oh-oh. And-and-- y-you can move?"
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| '''Galatea:''' "What's your name?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Uh-- I'm Hercules."
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| '''Galatea:''' "I am-- I'm-- "
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| '''Hercules:''' "Uh-- you-- Galatea. OK?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "I'll make her a cage-- out of reeds. Yeah! And I'll fill it with butterflies. Wow, it'll be beautiful! Just like her. Who am I kidding? It'll take a lot more than butterflies and birds to get Galatea to like me-- a lot more."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Uh, what're-what're you doin'?"
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| '''Galatea:''' "Don't be afraid of me. I'm full of love and affection."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Well-- that may be, but-- y-you see, I-I think that you have me confused for someone else."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Hercules would know what to do-- he always does. It always seems so easy to him. If I was Hercules, I'd-- I'd-- I'd bring her some _flowers_! Yeah! That's it! Flowers! OK. All right."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Hey, Hercules! Do you think she'll like flowers?"
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| '''Galatea:''' "Flowers?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "It's happened."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Yeah-- uh-- this is Hephaestus. He's, uh- the guy that made ya."
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| '''Galatea:''' "Hello."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Hi."
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| '''Galatea:''' "Hercules?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Yeah?"
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| '''Galatea:''' "Is he your friend?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Hephaestus? Oh-- Hephaestus my friend? Yeah-- Heph is the best! Oh, sorry. Yeah, listen, you know what I think? I think that you two kids should go away-- somewhere romantic-- somewhere fun-- huh? Somewhere very far-- oh, so far-- away from here."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' [Aside to '''Hercules''']: "Uh-- I still don't know what to say. Can you come with me?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "No."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "What about the guys? Maybe they'll help."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Well-- they couldn't make it any worse."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "So-- you think she'll like it? It's got the best views around here."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Yeah. Whoa! If we survive the trip."
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| '''Galatea:''' "Thank you for bringing me here."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Oh, Galatea, would you-- ?! Hey-- how about Hephaestus, huh? OK, maybe-- on the outside, a little bit-- a little bit rough, OK? But on the inside? [Whistles] There's a great guy, huh?"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Am I missing something, here?"
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| '''Jason:''' "When you figure it out, tell me."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "OK, all right. Food, yeah. Uh-- I got cheese, bread-- hi."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Oh [Chuckles]-- ah-- look at that! Goat cheese so fresh, there's fur on it! Ha-ha-ha. Hephaestus is amazing, isn't he? Oh, um-- you know, that Hephaestus is gonna make some girl very, very happy some day."
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| '''Jason:''' "That's Hephaestus' date-- you gotta back off."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Look-- I'm not doing it-- she is."
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| '''Jason:''' "Well, you better do something, soon, or he's gonna notice."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Galatea?"
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| '''Galatea:''' "Yes?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "We have to talk, OK?"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Is that goat cheese?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Galatea-- ya have to lay off."
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| '''Galatea:''' "I can't do that."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Why can't you do that?"
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| '''Galatea:''' "Because I don't want to-- and I have a _very_ strong will."
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| '''Hercules:''' "You got a strong will? And your senses are keen? And your heart is pure? And-- it's all because of me."
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| '''Galatea:''' "It's like-- you can see inside me."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Galatea-- stop. Listen."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Hercules!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Hephaestus-- I can explain-- all right?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' [Yells]
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| == Act Two ==
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| '''Hercules:''' "Heph-- just listen to me."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "I don't wanna hear your lies!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "I'm not gonna fight you, all right? We're brothers."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "I don't care."
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| '''Jason:''' "That's enough!"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Is this what you want, Hercules? I'll give you the woman you _deserve_. Come with me!"
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| '''Galatea:''' "Hercules!"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Get out of the way!"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Man, I've never seen Heph angry, before. I don't wanna see it, again."
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| '''Jason:''' "Be careful, Hercules. He may be a nice guy, but he's still a god."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "If Hercules wants you-- well, he can _have_ you! Your heart burns with passion for him. May your heart be cold as Olympian ice."
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| '''Hercules:''' "He's just so lonely, that he did something really wrong, you know?"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Poor guy-- he can't even _build_ a girl to like him. Hmm."
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| '''Jason:''' "Why was she going after you?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Mmm-- how should I know? Uh-- Galatea-- listen-- I know how you feel about-- whoa!"
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| [Fight]
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Wait a minute!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "What are you tryin' to do?"
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| '''Galatea:''' "I'm tryin' to_hurt_ you!"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "I wanted her to _reject_ Hercules, not attack him!"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Whoa-- their first argument's a doozie."
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| '''Jason:''' "She's serious."
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| '''Hercules:''' [Moans]
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Oh, this is terrible. I've _got_ to help them!"
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| '''Jason:''' "Let me, uh-- . Hey-- how you doin'? I was just-- whoaaaaaaaaaaaa! Ah! Ah! Ah!"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "She's trying to hurt you-- and them."
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Uh-- uh-- hi. Whoa! Ja-sonnnnnnnn!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "I'll get her. You help the guys."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "OK."
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| '''Jason:''' "You've put on a little weight, Iolaus!"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Tell me about it."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Yeah-- I gotta get a new approach. Jason! Just hold on, guys! Look, I don't understand. I thought you liked me."
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| '''Galatea:''' "My heart is closed to you."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Quick-- give me your hand."
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| '''Galatea:''' "What are you doing?!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "I'm trying to save you!"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "I wanted her to forget him-- not destroy him."
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| '''Jason:''' "Hephaestus!"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Can you give us a hand, here?!"
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| '''Galatea:''' "If you do not let me end now-- I shall only destroy you later! Don't you believe me?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Yeah, I believe you."
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| '''Galatea:''' "Then, why do you _do_ this?!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Because I have to. Why would you-- destroy me?"
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| '''Galatea:''' I have to."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "She's not real. This is all my fault."
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Hercules!"
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| '''Jason:''' "Let me pull you back!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Get off!"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "No, we're not leaving you here, Herc!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "If you get off, we'll have a chance to swing to safety! If you don't, we're all goin' down!"
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| '''Jason:''' "OK. Come on."
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Galatea-- I can't leave her! Galatea!"
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| '''Iolaus:''' "Heph, she's not real!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "On the count of three-- we're just gonna swing. Let go with your hands. One-- two. This is gonna hurt. Three!" [Yells]
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "Nooo! Galatea! Galatea!"
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| '''Hercules:''' "Is she OK?"
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| '''Jason:''' "The bridge couldn't hold her."
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| '''Hercules:''' "Hephaestus."
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| '''Hercules:''' "How you doin', Hephaestus?"
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| '''Hephaestus:''' "I never should have made you. I wanted to believe that you were real. I know she's not real, Hercules. Why does it still hurt that she's gone?"
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| '''Hercules:''' "I don't know. I wish that I did."
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| [[Category:Scripts]] | | [[Category:Scripts]] |
